Four Year Survivor in Astronaut Training

It was just another routine mammogram. It had been a few years since I’d had one. I would always do them like clockwork. But work had been so busy, I’d let taking care of myself fall by the wayside and missed a year or two, so I finally scheduled it.

Shortly thereafter I received a call from the nurse at my long-time doctor’s office saying that they wanted to do an ultrasound. First time that had happened! Then another call to do a biopsy. Shortly thereafter I got the call I never thought I’d get. It was March 18, 2009 when I heard “You have invasive ductal carcinoma of the left breast.”

My head was spinning. This can’t be MY diagnosis. But it was, so my thoughts went to how I would deal with MY REALITY. My paternal grandmother had breast cancer and lived a nice long life in spite of it, all without fancy treatments, as there was no money for that in those days. I had acquaintances that had had breast cancer and were thriving, so I felt my chances were good, too. I notified my family, friends and co-workers who were as shocked as I was! I knew I was in for the fight of my life! I decided I would face it positively, not allowing negative thought and asking only for prayers, positive energy and BIG smiles! My employer made it clear they were behind me 100% and they wanted me to focus on kicking some cancer butt!!!

A dear friend, Nuri Nuri told me to think of this whole process as “training” to be an astronaut, that I’d have to make up my mind that I’d do whatever it took to get through all of this “training” and that, when it was over, I’d be an astronaut! I loved that analogy and adopted it for my own!

As luck would have it, three of my co-workers had personal relationships with doctors at MD Anderson in Houston, TX, the premier cancer hospital in this galaxy, who placed calls in lightening speed on my behalf. But I didn’t want to go to MD Anderson! It was too big and scary! Surely I’d get lost in that monstrous maze! My Survivor friends all wanted to refer me to their doctors. It was all so overwhelming! Then I remembered meeting Laura Mannetti (a SURVIVOR), the wife of a co-worker, with whom I’d had an immediate connection that I could never quite put my finger on, but just knew we were very connected. She was a beautiful, fun-loving, sparkling personality, so full of life with a kind demeanor. She was the very busy mother of four beautiful kids and a husband. She was the first person I called. As busy as her life was, she offered her help without hesitation. I was so touched! Throughout my experience, Laura was my personal angel to whom I owe so much! She introduced me to MD Anderson, showed me the ropes and made me feel comfortable with MDA. She had been a nurse, so she knew the lingo and all the right questions to ask, plus she took copious notes! She got me in to see Dr. Anthony Lucci, a young, accomplished breast surgeon who was doing lots of research on the prevention of reoccurrence of cancer and I signed up to participate in his study. At our first meeting, it was determined that he was a music lover like me, so I KNEW he was on my team. My first meeting with him was more like a party as he and my dear friend Eva laughed a lot in between the serious medical discussion. My co-worker, Kiki Dikmen, got me in to see his personal friend, Dr. Banu Arun, MDA breast oncologist, who is also doing lots of research at MDA. She and I connected on our first meeting. I felt great confidence in the team that was going to help me beat this nasty beast! I signed up for a trial with Dr. Arun, figuring this research would help others one day and, maybe, help me. As luck would have it, the computer relegated me to both radiation and chemotherapy, so chemo was added to my treatment regimen.

My lumpectomy surgery, with Dr. Lucci at the scalpel, was scheduled early May 2009 and I came through it with flying colors. All the while, dear friends were in the waiting room that day, encouraging me with their presence. I recuperated that weekend and was back at my desk on Monday----smiling through the training.

My chemotherapy was scheduled to begin in May—four sessions, one every three weeks. I was having the double whammy of Taxotere and Cytoxan. Just my luck, I was allergic to the Taxotere, making it hard for me to breathe. I would be at the hospital for 12 hours or more on my chemotherapy day, because the nurses had to slow the infusion way down. My angel, Laura, accompanied me for my first round, then my friend Eva took the last three shifts, not wanting me to be there alone. I would never have asked for anyone to accompany me, but I was both thrilled and comforted for the company as this was an unsettling time. The chemo made me very tired and I lost my appetite as everything started tasting like tin. I contacted a natural healer in Hawaii who helped with some tasty organic options to boost my appetite. He also helped with a natural treatment when the breast got hard, refusing to drain, causing lots of pain. After the third chemo treatment, my hair started falling out, just a day before I was scheduled for a busy business trip to NYC. I went to my stylist, asking him to cut my long hair short. Poor guy didn’t know what to do as my hair started falling out in his hands and brush by the bucketful. The look on his face was priceless! I told him not to worry and that the short hair would help me get through this trip where I would be seeing all of our New York and New Jersey employees, mostly men, who we are used to seeing me sassy and very upbeat. I would not let anything keep this trip from being normal.   The next night my hair was all over my pillow and I told my co-worker our morning adventure would be looking for wigs there in NYC. We found a great place and soon I had a full head of hair for my afternoon meeting that the weather and humidity would not affect! What’s not to like?? I decided hair was something I could control when everything else in my life at that point seemed so far out of my control. When I arrived home from that trip, I asked a friend to give me a buzz cut, and then my sweetheart shaved my head. Wigs were in my future---lots of wigs, all colors and styles! Now I was ready for anything! My co-workers encouraged me and appreciated my upbeat attitude about all of this. This attitude made it easier for everyone (especially me) as people really don’t know how to react to all of this “cancer stuff.” I’m still smiling through the training!!!

It soon came to light that the chemo scarred my tear ducts over, causing constant watery eyes. They had to be ”opened up” in a doctor’s office. That was fun!!! Another challenge checked off the list. Furthermore, the chemo left me with neuropathy in both feet that continues today. I was accepted into a trial of biofeedback for it with no positive results for me, sorry to say. I am told there is more than likely nothing that can be done.  Still smiling!!

I finally made it through my chemotherapy and next was the 30 rounds of radiation that ended in November. Dr. Bloom and her team at the Bellaire radiation arm of MDA were great. I would run to the clinic (close to my office) have my radiation, change clothes and be back at work all in a little over 1/2 hour. Although I was now even more tired, I felt the radiation was a breeze.

We noticed that I had a tiny pinhole that would not heal. I was told not to swim or snorkel on our annual vacation to Cancun because of this, so I scheduled for a procedure to take care of that little inconvenience. This time the surgery would only heal to the size of a pencil top eraser. We waited until August of 2010 to do yet another surgery and this time the entire sight of the original surgery opened up and refused to heal. This was not what I was expecting!!! The radiation treatment that I thought was such a breeze was coming back to haunt me, not allowing my tissue to heal!  Training’s getting harder but I’m still smiling!!

It was at this point, as I was not interested in any more surgery, even plastic procedure; I was referred to the wound care center at Memorial Hermann to work on this new problem. The experts tried everything to get this sight to heal. For a period of time I had to wear a negative pressure wound therapy device, WoundVac, 24/7 that worked on healing the sight from the inside out. Finally after three months, just before they put me in the hyperbaric chamber as a last resort, the wound healed! I was overjoyed and did not care that the breast looked dented in! To me it was healed and THAT was a beautiful thing! It was my proof that I’d been on quite a journey and simply ecstatic that I had aced the training and was now, an Astronaut!   Biggest smile yet!!!!

I attributed my positive outcome to the fabulous care I received at MD Anderson, the never-ending support from my wonderful partner, Bob, my angel, Laura (who has since left this life on earth), a really, loving support system of superb friends, and a positive attitude in the face of adversity.